Bangor

This is a painting of  Main St  in Bangor that my mother painted in 1957.  She used the image from a postcard, but she added our family car, a 1957 Ford convertible, and my brother riding his bicycle.  This is where I was born, where I grew up among relatives who had also been born and raised there.  I was married there, worked there as a social worker at the Bangor State hospital along with my husband, my father, and my uncle.  I raised my own two children there.  It's appropriate that in the picture my ghostly silhouette fills the sky, reflected by the glass as I took the picture.

I moved here to Eastport, alone except for my three dogs, in 1987.  I arrived in the middle of a huge snowstorm, bidding good-bye to the movers who pulled cautiously away after unloading my worldly possessions.  It was a bewildering experience and I felt loose in the world, questioning my decision to be here constantly.  Well, the rest is history, as they say, and here I am.

But Lately I have been thinking about moving back to Bangor.  It seemed to me that it would be going "home."  These past weeks the thought has dominated my thoughts.  I even found a place to live, where I would be warm in the winter, which is an increasing priority for me.  I would have a real shower, modern appliances, access to public transportation, close to galleries and plays, restaurants and little coffee shops.  I would have friends.....the same ones I had before I left, other artists and opportunities to join the art community that has become unavailable to me here.  I would miss the ocean, but the city is on a large river that is within easy walking distance to where I would live.

All of these thoughts escalated to the point where I was at the very threshold of making the decision to go.  Then, as I went out to put my chickens in their house last night, the idea flew out of my head as if I had suddenly awakened from a dream.  As I looked around me I was overwhelmed and mystified that I could ever think of leaving.

I have felt like an outsider here since I was denied admission to the gallery that was so much a part of my life and identity.  The other members were my friends and I had a place in the community.  I believed I was liked by people in the town. Now I am isolated, an outsider, as I was when I first came here.  I see, though, that I'm not ready to turn around and go back home.

Painting outside

Today I went outside to paint with Diana, who is at her house here with some friends.  I haven't painted outside for a long time and I really enjoyed it.  I sat on the sidewalk, or where a sidewalk would be, looking toward these houses.  The laundry is what attracted me, and the lupine, which is in its Springtime glory.    I had a good time and I like the resulting painting, even though it is a bit over-worked.

I am putting this picture here despite my big plans for a separate blog for my paintings.  I spent over an hour again this morning trying to ad a link to it on this blog, but I gave up. I will have to abandon the idea if I can't somehow figure it out soon.  I know it's not that difficult, but the vocabulary in the directions is Greek to me.....I don't know how to fill in the required information.  It's so hard to admit that using a computer beyond the very basics is over my head.  As we used to say in the 60's.....Bummer.

Finally ........

I was beginning to think it was never going to be warm enough to go outside without a sweater, but yesterday it finally seemed like Spring is supposed to feel.  Today is also nice, so perhaps this time the weather will stay seasonal.  Yesterday I could see from my window about twenty sailboats on the water.  They looked beautiful, as sailboats always do, and I walked down to the bottom of the hill to get a better look.  As I was standing there with camera in one hand and dog leashes in the other, a car pulled up behind me.  A woman jumped out with a very big camera.  She told me her husband was on one of the boats, participating in a race to Grand Mannan.  I don't know if this is a regular summer occurrence, but it was certainly a wonderful sight.  Because of the wind currents, I'm guessing, the participants were moving back and forth, providing quite a ballet.

The other is the annual Spring picture of my garden, or at least the edge of it that lines the front walk.  Every year it is more lush.  I move things around to make more room for the expanding bushes and plants, and I actually trimmed the branches on the tree next to the front door.  They were threatening to block the front entrance to the house, not to mention stealing the light from the surrounding plants. I felt as if I were mutilating my child, but comforting myself by trying to equate my hacking with the idea of a haircut The lilac that I planted as a little off-shoot of the tree I had on Wilson Street is about a foot taller than I am now, and more gorgeous every year.  The town is full of lilacs, and the wonderful smell is everywhere.

I wasn't able to ad my art blog address to this page, but I will keep trying.  All I managed to do was delete the links I already had.

As an aside, I would like to ad a personal note to my faithful northern Michigan reader, a kindred spirit if ever there was one.....Please send me the address of your blogs. I lost them quite some time ago.................

New Bumper Sticker

I am the only one I know who has one of these...not surprising since I know so few people. I would love to see her get elected president, basically because she has two qualifications.....she is a democrat, and she is a woman.  I haven't agreed with some of the things she has said, but I am sadly not very savvy where politics and policy are concerned.  I used to be, but I have lived long enough to know that when I take a stand, I am likely to be ignorant of important considerations.  I know only that republicans stand for everything I am against, and that male leaders have got us where we are today.  I have often thought that the world's problems will never be solved....not one of them....until women run things.  Males of every species tend to be territorial bullies, solving disputes by exhibiting aggression.

Well, I won't go on about that, but I display my bumper sticker proudly.

My computer was not working and had to be in the computer hospital for a few days.  Now it is a pleasure to use, though I had to learn a lot of things over again.  I have taken pictures to post, though, and will do that over the next day or two.  I also started another blog where I intend to post my paintings and my thoughts about them.  Mainly I got the idea because this blog is listed on the ad for the gallery, which is really not appropriate for that purpose.  This will give me a place to showcase my paintings like a real artist.  I will try to ad it to the list on the sidebar of this blog, but there's no way of knowing whether I can do it or not.

New Birdfeeder

Ever since I moved the table, I haven't been able to see the bird feeder very well from my chair.  So, I decided to put another feeder outside over the chicken house.  This is only about three feet from where I sit.  It took a few days, but the birds found their new food source and started happily chowing down.  I feel surrounded by birds now because they still use the original feeder as well.

A few years ago, raccoons found the feeders and ate the birdseed, and eventually the chickens.  Once I realized what was happening I moved the feeders.  I am taking a chance putting them back there, but the chickens are more secure now.  And the raccoons can't get inside the coop, which is what happened before.  If I've made a mistake I will be devastated.

Later the same day...................

Amaryllis

Here is the long-awaited Amaryllis.  I have had the bulb since Thanksgiving and watched it sit and sit and sit until a few weeks ago.  Then a tiny green leaf appeared.  It grew so slowly that I expected to find it dried up and dead whenever I checked it.  Then the bud appeared.  I still didn't dare hope that it would keep going and produce a flower.  I didn't dare touch it or move it.  I watered it once, fearful that I had killed it, but it was a very small drink. Then another bud appeared next to the first one.  I think the plant meant to produce leaves, since the blossoms sit on a single bare stem about ten inches tall, but made a mistake.  It is beautiful just the same, and the second bud (behind this one) will open soon.  I hope the first one stays healthy so that both of them will be there at the same time.

I am thrilled that after three years of aborted attempts( meaning I looked at the bulbs several times a day), I finally have a flower.