Art day today found me in the mood for a self portrait. I have done so many over the years, but not recently. I must say that what I did is far from flattering, yet it is the way I see myself. I'm unkempt and thoughtful, looking inward.
This was done from a photograph I took a few weeks ago. I was coming downstairs and caught sight of myself in the mirror beside the front door. The sun was coming in through the window, lighting my face dramatically. I went for the camera and caught it, knowing that I would enjoy painting it. I did, too.
There was a lot of talk at Judy's about people "from away" and those who have always lived here. Outsiders vs. natives. It is a discussion I have had countless times in my life, with many different people. I managed to keep my temper, but it is so disconcerting that so many people feel superior to people less educated, less worldly, less intelligent, than they are. I suppose that I, too, feel superior in that I imagine I see both sides of the coin clearly. It is nonetheless difficult to hear my friends calling others stupid because they see things from a different perspective. I wish that they could at least admit that their view is an opinion and not a fact. I also resent being told what I think, or what I would do under certain circunstances. Luckily I was able to keep from feeling overly offended and simply kept most of what I was thinking to myself. It was a pleasure to be able to stay pretty much unemotional, not feeling compelled to put forth my opinions too strongly. In times past I would have come home upset and irritable. I have come to realize that it makes no difference what I think, or what they think either. Things are what they are. I am a Maine native, and that means something that people who are not can't understand. I believe we are the product of our environment, and that there is a uniqueness to different parts of the country, as well as the world. We judge others according to rules that they have not been participants in making, and were, in fact unaware of. And they judge us the same way. We are not speaking the same language. It is easier just to let it go.
I had my teeth cleaned today.