Thursday, August 09, 2007
I am feeling quite antisocial and actually decided not to go to the concert at the art center tomorrow night. My favorite pianist is playing, but even that fails to move me. I am most comfortable here at home, with the dogs. My existence has an aimlessness about it at the moment and people seem foreign to me with their interest in daily things. I can only listen to their talk and feel I have nothing in common with them, that I do not belong to the same species.
Well, it is a temporary state of mind, no doubt. My financial situation continues to worsen, and although money doesn't usually cause me a lot of chagrin, I worry over recent developments. My housing assistance has been cut drastically as of next month, resulting in quite a problem on my minimal income. There are many bills overdue with no way to catch up. These things float around my head like buzzing flies, interrupting the state of mind brought on by the loss of Alice. I don't know where to focus my attention, so end up wandering around in a kind of limbo of inaction. I eat ice cream.